chocolateCHAT| Scandal Was a #GAMECHANGER

 

::closes all the curtains, turns off the lights, turns on the fan, gets under 3 comforters, and turns on Law and Order marathon::

I am in shambles.  I have to be honest after watching Scandal last night I only wanted to cry my eyes out and eat a half gallon of pecan and pralines ice cream with a pint of strawberry cheesecake ice cream on the side. I am without a shadow of a doubt depressed.

Fitz broke up with me*cough* I mean Olivia. Why do I feel like I just got dumped? Why was I so angry that sweet Fitz turned to his demonic wife for support? Why did my home girl Abby have to get pimped out for a memory card?

This is too much. I told a friend this morning, “I got my own issues going on I don’t have time for Shonda!” They should have a warning that comes on before Scandal that says,

WARNING:  Do not watch if you are already stressed out, have been in a trifling relationships, are somebody’s booty call, have high blood pressure, your bills are past due, your kids are still awake, been recently hospitalized, and/or are within one week of being on your monthly cycle. You will experience highs and lows of emotion within the next 60 minutes that could change your life for the better or worse. This show is rated WEYLU. (Will Eff Your Life Up)Watch at your own risk!

Now had I saw this warning I would have turned the channel and watched CSI or something instead of getting entwined in the web of lust, betrayal, Columbus Short, lies, love, hit man anonymous, Eff Becky, Free Huck, “That’s a bad jacket!”, He loves me he loves me not that is Scandal. I hate Shondaland, but I’m stuck here.

So here are my moments of O_O ,  WTF, &  ::tears::

1: “You know who you are. You know what this is. And don’t pretend you don’t. We do what needs to be done and we don’t question why. We put the personal to the left. Doesn’t matter who gets hurt. Doesn’t matter what gets broke. It’s not the thing that needs fixing, it does not matter. You want to cry about your feelings? Hmm? Really? Here? We don’t get to have feelings. That’s the job. Gladiators don’t get to have feelings. We rush into battle. We’re soldiers. We get hurt in the fight we suck it up and we hold the line and we don’t question. And you know it, Abby.” – Harrison.

Dear sweet baby Jesus in a barn wrapped in scraps of clearance fabric from Jo-anns please un-melt me! EVERYTIME this man is on the scene he is putting somebody in his place! WONT HE DO IT?! Yes Harrison will! Anybody else think that Olivia saved Harrison from a life of pimping?

 

 

2. Cyrus once again proves how much of a goon he is by putting a hit on his husband?! I don’t care that he didn’t go through with it! The point it that he actually made the original call! GOON. GANGSTA. Oh lets not forget the naked chat that not so low key told his husband that he doesn’t trust him!

 

 

 

3. “Nobody likes babies.” Mellie is heartless. She risked the life of the poor child by inducing and then voices that she doesn’t like it. I’m going to pour gasoline on her drawers so she explodes when she walks into hell.

 

4. “You need something…..I changed my mind.”- Fitz  My heart literally stopped beating. WHY FITZ WHY?!  Why can’t he give her a chance to explain? The way he spoke to her like, “heaux be gone!” and the pitiful and defeated look on Olivia’s face just drained me of all hope for MY future. She was sitting in that funeral alone and I was looking the EXACT same way on my couch! After that scene of, “say *kiss* you’ll *kiss* wait *kiss* for *kiss* me *kiss*” How are we supposed to move on?

5.”Hows that for big office talk.” – Abby Say what you want about my home girl Abby but she is a loyal goon. She gave up the goods and a man that loves her for a memory card. That’s loyal. That’s what a pep talk from Harrison aka Scandal P.I.M.P. will do to you. Have ya throwing your panties for best buy gift cards. (refer to #1 to understand)

6. In the preview they mentioned another relationship… Excuuusssseee me?! Shonda?? Oh No You Didn’t?! I been on this rollercoaster with you for quite some time and I think I deserve my rachet yet happy ending.

chocolateCHAT| And this is how Queen Beyonce quiets the haters. #boom

Can I get a #boom?

“Any Questions?” – Beyonce

chocolateCHAT| Are you questioning Beyonce’s actions? OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!

I tried to keep quiet about this whole “lip-sync” issue because frankly I didn’t think it deserved a response!  But now that it has been confirmed that she did indeed lip-sync I have to say.. SO EFFIN’ WHAT?! SHE’S BEYONCE!  She could have walked out in a clown suit with a pirate hat on and instructed the audience to sing and it would have been okay!

Who cares whether or not she actually sang the song? The lip-syncing is only a negative thing for those people that can’t actually sing. Think of people like R&B artist Ciara who can barely even HUM let alone sing.  In the real world though we all KNOW that Beyoncé can not only sing but she can s-a-n-g! Have you seen the YouTube video of her singing 1+1 a capella ? I almost caught ‘tha ghost! #WONTHEDOIT! Please explain to me why people are comparing her to Kelly Clarkson? “Well Kelly sang live…” Did you really just compare the KING with Kelly Clarkson? OFF WITH YOUR HEAD PEASANT! 

Here’s another thing… it’s not like it hasn’t been done before people! ::shrug:: Sources have long since confirmed that Whitney Houston lip-synced her  popular rendition of the National Anthem years ago.   Does that make her version any less freakishly-awesome?! You can disagree with me but Beyoncé is DEFINTELY on her way to HOUSTON status (some may argue she’s already there).

Oh and let’s not forget how cold it was out there and the obvious audio problems they were having. Now if they could have created a pre-heated, clear, box for Beyoncé to warm up, sound check and perform in then maybe… (tehehe)

Furthermore, let’s be real, her performance or presence wasn’t for you! It was for #stans like me that love to see King Beyoncé address her kingdom (no typo)! So if you are one of those that are really letting your blood pressure rise because she didn’t risk losing her voice for the next week by singing in 37 degree weather then you have more serious issues. Besides all members of the beehive know that if she WANTED to she COULD HAVE done it without any issues, but she didn’t so she didn’t…  BOOM!

Just in case you missed the awesomeness that is King Bey here ya go (you’re welcome). ALL BOW TO THE KING!

Sincerely,

The Beehive

chocolateCHAT| Oopsie… just realized I’ve been slacking!

I was sitting here thinking I have so much to write about… and then it hit me *BAM* you’re neglecting your baby! Glad yall didn’t call BPS  (Blog Protective Services) on me. You forgive me? Of course you do!

If it makes anything better I’ve been working  on new marketing venture for my photography and not just sleeping my life away. Although I do have an excessive amount of not-awake hours this week. ::shrug:: Sometimes one needs to rest ones mind and if one should need excessive hours to do so one should not be judged.  That sounded very King James-ish!

Okay back to the fun!

Catching up,

Lady Godiva

chocolateCHAT| Johnny “WON’T HE DO IT” Manziel Has Done It Again! Pre-Season Rankings are out!

This kid needs to FLOAT though his college coursework! Please tell me there are young freshmen massaging his arms and legs while he sits in class?

Can I get a WHOOP!!!!!

#GIGEM #JOHNNYFOOTBALL #HOWDY #ROLLTEARSROLLAGAIN #1 #AGGIENATION

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taken from CBS Sport.com [ http://gamedayr.com/gamedayr/cbs-sports-2013-college-football-preseason-rankings/]

However, despite the Alabama Crimson Tide having won three of the nation’s previous four national championships, senior college football analyst Dennis Dodd is not ready to give coach Nick Saban’s bunch the benefit of the doubt.

Read on — there’s a surprise awaiting you, the erstwhile college sports fan, at the bottom of the page.

25. BYU Cougars

24. Ole Miss Rebels

23. Northern Illinois Huskies

22. Nebraska Cornhuskers

21. Oklahoma State Cowboys

20. Oklahoma Sooners

19. Kansas State Wildcats

18. TCU Horned Frogs

17. LSU Tigers

16. Northwestern Wildcats

15. Boise State Broncos

14. Oregon State Beavers

13. Florida State Seminoles

12. Texas Longhorns

11. Louisville Cardinals

10. Notre Dame Fighting Irish

9. Clemson Tigers

8. Florida Gators

7. South Carolina Gamecocks

6. Georgia Bulldogs

5. Oregon Ducks

4. Ohio State Buckeyes

3. Stanford Cardinal

2. Alabama Crimson Tide

1. Texas A&M Aggies

chocolateCHAT| Happy Birthday Aaliyah!

Y’all I can still remember the day that it was announced on the radio that Aaliyah had passed away in a tragic plane crash. I was so upset! Even now when I watch the memorial services and documentaries I always end up in tears. She would have been 34 years old today.  Such a beautiful individual, with so many adoring fans, is hopefully resting in glory.

sidenote: Please do not start the “If Aaliyah was here there would be no Beyonce” debate at any point today, tomorrow, or in the year 2013.

REST IN PEACE!

chocolateCHAT| I Am Your Child’s God-Parent…Not Your Baby-Daddy!

Disclaimer: This post has absolutely nothing to do with my beautiful god-daughter and her mother, my sister since the 2nd grade! I love them both very much. 

I think the role and definition of god-parent has changed over the years. I was taught that the godparent’s role was to take care of the child’s needs if something should happen to the parents. In detail, if the parents should die, go to prison, get lost in the desert, fall into a manhole never to be seen again, or anything else like that then it becomes the godparent’s job to ensure that the child’s needs are met.

Nowadays these parent’s are like, “Why haven’t you come to visit your godchild?!” “You know little Sara has cheerleading coming up? You putting in on her uniform?” “You don’t ever do anything for little Sara…you’za a trifling god-mama!”

DANG! It’s like when you’re named the godparent you literally just became a PARENT! I have heard some of the craziest stories from people being named godparents without their knowledge to people being named godparents ONLY because of their financial stability! It’s nuts! What do these ratchet women think, “Oooh let’s pick Ashley as a godparent! She got a real good job!” Seriously?! SITYOASSDOWN.com. That thought pattern is NS.

GOD-PARENT does not equal BABY DADDY hunny! It is not my responsibility to take care of your off spring! Apart of being a parent is doing what must be done to take care of your child.

I don’t want to make it seem like this scenario only comes from single parents, because I’ve even seen it with two parent homes as well.

My munchkin’s godparent are the best!! They are supportive and loving of our entire family but I definitely don’t call them when the munchkin needs something! That’s our job as her parents to provide for her. God forbid, but if we should get lost sailing the ocean I trust that each of these individuals would jump into action and ensure that she is emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually healthy in a way that her father and I would approve of.

So if you’re one of those parents depending on your child’s godparent to take care of your child…stop…inhale…. see there YOU’RE STILL ALIVE!!!  Leave them folk alone and handle your business.

Hahaha okay I’m done for now!

Until Next Time,

Lady Godiva

chocolateCHAT |New Year’s Resolutions: QUIT LYING TO YO SELF!

If you are around me near the end of each year you have probably already heard my rant about New Year’s Resolutions via Facebook or if you’re unlucky enough in person!  Hahaha!

Here’s my deal. I despise New Year Resolutions. Why? Because its a form of procrastination (which I do) and they always FAIL.

Lemme help you out a little bit. (You’re welcome in advance) Your resolutions fail because they weren’t sincere in the first place!! You only made the “promise” to yourself to lose weight this year because it’s what you think you are supposed to do. The FIRST problem is that you didn’t just start needing to lose weight hunny. You could have stood to lose a few pounds six months ago. You definitely knew it then and did nothing. The SECOND problem with this resolution is that the whole “lose weight” thing has been your resolution for how many new years to date? ((waiting on you to use all your fingers and toes to help you calculate)) I’m only using weight loss ’cause that’s a popular resolution. How about MY all time favorite New Years Resolution? I’m going to stop cursing! Bahahaha! I think that’s the one that turned me against New Years Resolutions because I’d get cut off by some tipsy driver on my way home from New Years Eve Church service and …….well you know. ::shrug::

C’mon! Quit lying to yourself. If somebody lied to you on the same day every year for over 10 years would you take them seriously?! Nope! Do you get it now? You don’t believe ya own damn self!!

Wouldn’t it be great to just say RIGHT NOW instead of waiting for January 1st that “I’m going to be a better me today than I was yesterday” or “Today I’m going to  _____________”. Now that could include anything that needs to be fixed in your life but the point is that it starts RIGHT NOW! It doesn’t wait for some magical day that’s going to give you strength to do something you couldn’t do the rest of the 364 days out of the year. Plus it gives you baby steps to take. All addictions take at least 12 steps right? Trust me if you have been having your resolution/habit for at least a year you are definitely addicted to it!

Let’s make DAILY RESOLUTIONS! Hey at least that will give us more opportunities to WIN this year!

Besides if you just HAVE to make a New Year’s Resolution shouldn’t it be done on your birthday? I mean that is the actual start of your New Year right? (common sense ain’t that common)

Next year will be a great year for you…but TODAY could be friggin’ awesome as well if you just try.

::holds up glass:: Here’s to a great day chatters!! HAPPY NEW DAY!!

Until Next Time,
Lady Godiva

chocolateCHAT| No More Sippin’ Old Wine

I had a new experience last night. It was post-Christmas festivities and the hubby and I were finally winding down.  Seeing that it was our 1^st Christmas together in our home (we normally travel) we decided to get into the holiday “spirit” with our favorite “spirits”! Hahaha!

Of course chatters you know I had to have my Riesling, chilled, and in my hand painted wine glass (hair flip) and DH opened his new bottle of American Honey. I sat back, sipped my wine and exhaled. Now at first I didn’t notice anything other than it tasted a little stronger, but as I continued to taste it I became overwhelmed with a “spoiled fruit” after taste! YUCK! Have you ever had spoiled wine?  I bet you have some right now!

You may say no but let me compare this to something I’ve recently experienced. I have encountered an individual that looks good on the outside. I mean, seriously, if you didn’t know any better (which I do) you would swear that this person is awesomeness. But then came the sensation that something was wrong. I’ll call it my intuition. I could just sense that even though the bottle was really fancy the insides were FOUL!  Needless to say I was right.  Now what to do… Some people say, “Forgive and Forget”. Uuhhh yea I’ll pass on that forget part. Some people say, “You Live and You Learn.” Ehhh I agree but what comes after that?

I like to stick with what my grandfather said, “Fool me once; shame on you. Fool me twice; shame on me.”  So I like to take precaution to ensure that I’m not sipping on old wine ever again.

Here’s my plan of action for that wine in my fridge and the wine in my life! THROW THAT WINE AWAY! Whatever old wine you have in your life you need to rid yourself of!  Trust me it’s not going to get better with time! That relationship, associate, individual, bad habit, unhealthy eating, procrastination, stagnation, etc. is not going to get better with time. Chances are you’ve already lived with it for years! Has it gotten better yet? (Don’t worry I’ll wait….)

THROW THAT ISH AWAY!  It’s foul now it’ll be foul later. Stop setting yourself up to be left with a bad taste in your mouth (oh snap! I finally get that saying!!!) It may be hard to do but it’s necessary and you never know what or who is getting ready to take that position in your life as soon as you free it up!

Until Next Time,

Lady G.

chocolateCHAT| Moment of Silence for Sandy Hook